Tuesday, January 20, 2009

no, seriously...

Screw it. So I just started this blog mostly to humor my best friend, roommate, and occasional nemesis Brooke, who somehow convinced me last night that in order to get my dating life (and thus most of my actual life, does everyone else date a lot just to get free food?!) more manageable I should be all blog-like about it and it would make everything better. Only here I am totally bored out of my mind and wishing there was better reality television to watch. Maybe if I just turn on the television, and I'm really, really lucky, it will be one of those shows where people get kicked in the balls a lot. And then I'll find some cheese doodles to eat while watching it.

Anyways. Brooke said she's going to check up on me and everything, sort of like that counselor at camp did the entire summer after I did that one thing to the kid who wore headgear. Which reminds me, SAW IV totally owes me money for stealing that idea from me.

So I'm supposed to write about the guys I'm going on dates with and the guys I'm NOT going on dates with (read: all the freaks that ask me out, it's like this city is a goddamn MAGNET for them, or maybe I'M the magnet? Wait, deep thought, must resist...) and then you, the reader who is probably reading this when you're supposed to be doing something productive at work, gets to hear all about it and comfort yourself that at least it wasn't you who dated that one guy who had his jaw wired shut. Now, in his defense, it was because of a car accident, but it made the goodnight kiss super inappropriate.

Also, on a totally unrelated note, the guy that kept asking me out repeatedly from, like, seventh grade to oh, I don't know, a couple days ago (so WEIRD that he was at the same car mechanic's shop, especially when he asked me for a ride home after he told me he didn't have a car) just moved into the apartment across the courtyard. Is this a small world or what?!


  1. I once met someone who dated only for the free food, if it makes you feel better. Whenever she was on a date, and the check came, she'd just roll her eyes around, looking anywhere but at the little leather wallet thing they put the bill in, and then she'd just say "thank you" to her date, as though he'd already paid. Then, after this happened five times with the same guy, she'd treat him to a coffee or a breakfast burrito, something cheap. She's still single, but I don't know if it has anything to do with the free food or not.

  2. Umm...I NEVER pay for my food. And you shouldn't either, Jody. You're entertaining them with your wit and intelligence, and you probably spent a lot of money on makeup, hair and clothes. so never, EVER pay for your food. Bonus if you get them to pay for groceries.