Some people are such whiners.
And if you notice, everything sort of hits at once, right? When it rains, it pours crazy people, all around the same time of the month.
Brooke might kill me for that last sentence.
Seriously, though, let's just face facts here: we live in an apartment. Apartments, much like houses and other various places of residence, have pests. We get ladybugs, like clockwork, every spring.
LADYBUGS.
Not even cockroaches, or ring of fire ants or whatever the hell they're called, or cats. Just harmless, cute little ladybugs. And Brooke goes all Universal Soldier on me and demands I slaughter them all. They're cute! They're harmless! And they drive Brooke insane! As far as I'm concerned, they are .0001% proof of God's existence in this world. And I'm not about to wipe out an entire colony of ladybugs that are eating her leftovers, as long as they stay away from my cheese doodles.
And I have a breakfast date with Tommy, this weird Emo kid who had a crush on me in high school and tried to impress me by burning down the gym. While I was in it.
Clearly I'm going to need a good night's sleep to handle this date, and clearly Brooke's idea of the best time to get me to eradicate an entire coven of ladybugs is at 5 am. I didn't even know 5 am EXISTED.
So I'm tired, Brooke is losing her mind, Tommy's needy and um, weird on the date, and honestly, all I really remember about how it went involves coke, an answering machine, and a gun. It's really all kind of a blur, because after I got home I took a nice 18 hour nap.
Point being, I'm not a hippy or a voter or anything, but I really feel like this is my chance to show Brooke that life is sacred and important. I'd tell Tommy the same thing, except his family has since filed a missing person's report, so I don't know how to get a hold of him, and honestly, I really don't care that much. He probably just went on a two week long road trip without telling anyone. I do that all the time.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment